things katster's not allowed to do as an election clerk..

[katster]

So I got my official confirmation today. I have the very important job of First Time Clerk at Lassen View Elementary. And now I am sworn to do this by penalty of law. So here we go. katster is reporting for duty.

tangaroa said something today that made me laugh:
[15:48] <Tangaroa> If you walk in and announce "I am Katrina Templeton, and I am REPORTING FOR DUTY!!1" you're liable to get fired

So I want to start the list of 'things katster is not allowed to do as an election clerk'. Anybody got any good ideas?

Comments

[mactavish.livejournal.com]

No wearing a shirt that says EAT BUSH on it.

[salinn.livejournal.com]

"Democrats! Vote here!" "Republican? You're scheduled for tomorrow."

[loopychew.livejournal.com]

* Do not ask, "so, whose ballot box should I stuff?"
* Nor should you ask, "who wants to stuff MY ballot box?"
* Be subtle when doctoring results. Acceptable: Ink smudge. Unacceptable: fire.

[usekh.livejournal.com]

Katser will not draw hitler moustaches on posters of Bush

[tropism.livejournal.com]

Katster will not hack the touch-screen terminals to make Kerry win. *

* Unless the other side already has done it for Bush.

[dwhagar.livejournal.com]

Katster is not to go up to every voter and say "walla-balla-bing-bang" when they vote for kerry and "oooo, and he makes a bad move in the end of the round" when they vote for bush.

[lirazel.livejournal.com]

Katster will not hack the computers to create prompts that ask Bush voters, "Do you REALLY want to do this?" "Reeeeeeealy?" "Are you suuuuuure?" and so on, before recording their votes, even though it would be lots of fun.

Katster Must Not

[shmuelisms.livejournal.com]

ask people "Would you like fries with that?" when they enter their vote.

[ Says the ex-pat who is too amused with the circus to actually vote,
  and who's registered on Kerry's home-turf (Boston) in any case ]

[vacheestfachee.livejournal.com]

...Tell people that their votes didn't go through because they messed up their chads. *duck*

...Um, paint your entire body red-white-n-blue as a show of patriotism... scares the grannies. ;)

...Run around singing the "Boot to the Head" song, preferably wearing big boots. [i.e., "...people voting Republican, give them a boot to the head!"]

I'll try to think of more. *hugs* Good luck to you... you have to tell us what it's like once you've done it. I'd imagine that that would be a crazy job.