writing biographies of katster.

[katster]

[in re: a note in my mailbox asking for a biography of me for a project. I'll have more to say about the project later.]

katster: now i have to write a 50 word bio. @whee. Small prices to pay, I suppose.
tropism: Horrors!
katster: I hate writing bios. :)
tropism: Get someone else to write it? ;)
katster: yeah, but who?
tropism: I'll do it for ya. "Katster grew up in the wilds of California, where she and her family raised riding lizards at their ranch. After she was terribly crippled by an ill-tempered lizard, she turned briefly to selling mushrooms, but went into writing after she realised that shitakes were already available in grocery stores everywhere."
katster falls over laughing.
tropism: "She now lives in Brazil with her service-animal, Kumba, a liger which she rides to town daily."
tropism: "She enjoys sushi, video games, and world domination. Her success with each is ... varied."
katster: Part of me is horrified, and part of me is fascinated and wishes to subscribe to your newsletter.
tropism: "She is happily married to Patrick Stewart, but they found that she could only bear to visit him during winters, when the thousands of dog-sized geckos that he keeps to drive off missionaries and telemarketers hibernate. Sadly, Katster has never gotten over her fear of lizards."

So now I'm tempted. LJ world, you have fifty words. Write my bio. %) (Okay, so Sev took 266 words, although the first one is 50. So you can have more words if you like.)

Comments

How's this?

[archangelbeth]

Katster was decanted from the alien ship into the wilds of Maine; she was rescued from the ignominy of being raised by beavers by a pair of fur-trappers. Through a variety of adventures which we have not the space to relate here, she narrowly avoided being adopted by politicians, hairdressers, or dog-breeders, and grew up in a small psionic commune in California. Her hobbies are writing, earning money, and leaving subliminal messages on LiveJournal.