nowhere for the katster

[katster]

there are days when i'm not sure i'm going to fit in anywhere.

today is one of those days where that feeling is stronger than usual.

today is one of those days where i should just wise up that i'm...

i don't know.

just really feeling like the octagon peg in a square world. that's all. i'll be better tomorrow.

Comments

[tropism.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[aris-tgd.livejournal.com]

Hey, don't feel bad because folks would rather talk about sex than Jesus. That's most liberals.

It's just... like how I feel when KJ starts talking about cars. I appreciate that he's got an interest, but I have absolutely nothing to say.

[katster.livejournal.com]

Well...it's not about the sex. Even though I confess to feeling somewhat awkward when that subject comes up because, well, I don't have much to contribute to it -- partly because of lack of experience and partly because I just don't know what to say that won't sound stupid. And the other subject was winding down anyway.

it's just -- there was a sudden flashback to days that were not so kind to me and it's thrown me in a melancholy mood. And normally, I'd just mutter at zibblsnrt in private about the whole damned mess, but he's not here. And I'm not sure who else to talk to.

So it's kinda like the days where I was on the outside looking in, and yeah. Just hit a raw point I haven't really dealt with, and *whomp*. It's just a bad night.

As I said, I'll probably be better tomorrow.

-kat

[aris-tgd.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I realize it was probably a trigger thing. But I wanted to let you know I noticed and I was sorry for the way things had run there.

[tropism.livejournal.com]

Even though I confess to feeling somewhat awkward when that subject comes up because, well, I don't have much to contribute to it -- partly because of lack of experience and partly because I just don't know what to say that won't sound stupid.

I find that conversations are kind of like sex -- fake it 'till you make it. ;)

[djenk.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[salinn.livejournal.com]

sometimes the way I handle that is to bash out an octagon world for myself...

[tropism.livejournal.com]

"I reject your reality and subsitute my own!"

Yeah, that approach worked for me, too. :)

[archangelbeth]

*scritchies*

[tsjafo.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[nekoneko.livejournal.com]

I may only be one person, but you fit in just fine in my little world. ^_^

*hugs and warm Chai tea*

[johnpalmer.livejournal.com]

Just to play with your metaphor a bit, and hopefully cheer you up, an octagon with the right width will fit perfectly well in a square hole... there'll be gaps, but hey, sometimes you want gaps, a little bit of elbow-room, you know?

[lirazel.livejournal.com]

Well, first of all, it's good that you know the feeling will pass.

And second, this is what I would call an expected reaction to the gap between your new resolve and what's needed to achieve your goal. "Between the idea and the reality/Between the motion and the act/Falls the Shadow," and all that.

And anytime you want to talk about sex, Jesus, or both, in serial or parallel, you know where to find me!

[leto-bucher.livejournal.com]

*hugs* *lurves upon the katster*

You'll be cool, mate. :)

[whytraven.livejournal.com]

* hug *
I feel like that more often than I admit to.